I was recently asked if there was a ‘timeline’ of my career somewhere. There isn’t. That got me to thinking, I better put it to paper before I lose my mind completely … which of course, got me to thinking ABOUT my career.

I turn 65 in July. I have already signed up for Medicare, and am taking my social security early. These two things will allow me to start winding down my “career”, however, the question is, do I want to do that?

I am happiest when I have a project. I love the process, not necessarily the outcome. Once the curtain rises on a new show, my interest wanes and I’m on to the next thing. One of my greatest pleasures in life is being able to give work to performers and pay them well. If I stop producing shows, I will no longer have that joy in my life. It’s a big part of what keeps me interested to stay in the game.

Aye, but here’s the rub. The higher up you go in the food chain, the more you open yourself up to risk. People assume things of you that aren’t true, but that is the nature of the game. You either accept it and move on, or you fret about it. I fret. My oldest brother recently asked me please, not to go into politics (I’m very politically involved), and I laughed and assured him I wouldn’t. I don’t like not being liked. It’s been a problem for me since I was very young and something I have worked on throughout my life, heeding my mother’s words, “there are people you don’t like, so there must be people that don’t like you.” I just re-read my post here in my Journal about “Detractors”. Truth bomb alert!

I lost my vested interest in what I do when I was sued by an entertainer for wrongful termination, after I released her from contract. She was in breech of said contract, but she sued me anyway. Easy for her, as her father was an attorney. She dragged it out for a year and a half, eventually dropping all charges. The result of her actions put almost 100 people out of work. This prompted me to re-assess what I do and what I was willing to shrug off. I found out I care too much. My associates who had been through the same chuckled at my consternation and gave me the following advice … “let the lawyers handle it and just pay their bill at the end of the month.” ACK! Really? Not care about the untruths that were being spoken? I dwell in truth, so this for me was harder than anything I had done in my lifetime … to pay a bill knowing it was 100% wrong, and also, to shut up about it? I’m laughing recalling it.

What I found out about me is, I have no desire to “play with the big boys” if this is what it entails. I thought about our President and how this has been his modus operandi for his entire life. How does he sleep at night? Some people don’t need much sleep, so I am assuming he is one of those. I, on the other hand, need 8 hours. I’m THAT person. I LOVE my sleep … uninterrupted, snoring, blissful, soul stirring, sleep.

I have yet to file business papers for Choozi here in Florida. I am carefully weighing a decision not to do so, as I have found myself teaching again.  With my social security, and just my teaching, I don’t even have to dip into my retirement account, which I guess means, I’m not retired … yet.

I am hesitating to put my career timeline to paper, as it feels like it would be putting an exclamation point to the end of it.  The problem with that is, sometimes I feel like I’m just getting started!